After my second mental break, I began DBT (Dialectical Behavioral Therapy) to learn how to cope with choices I made that led to the one thing I couldn’t let happen again… and yet it did. How in the world would I survive this a second time? Two words helped me to get on with it… Radical Acceptance…the art of accepting what is.
My Story
You see, poor mental health became my downfall. I had a runaway mind that ruminated all its own, anxiety that never left me, sleep became an elusive fairy tale, and pain, and sensory misinterpretation were rampant. I felt like I was losing my mind and that I would certainly, and literally, die, leaving my children all by themselves. This fear, no matter how irrational, held to me like a vice… impossible to escape.
Panic attack after panic attack debilitated me. I had to pull over when driving on the freeway because the panic attacks would cause speckled eyesight and I couldn’t see. At night, they kept me awake. Each time I felt like I would finally doze off to sleep, I could feel the adrenaline slide into my veins, waking me instantly to a thrashing heart, punching me over and over from within. It was as though I could feel every devilish beat… and the pause in between.
In fact, I could hear my heartbeat in my ears, swoosh-swoosh-swoosh, without end, unwelcomed. Debilitating all its own.
I felt like I was losing my mind and that I would certainly, and literally, die, leaving my children all by themselves. This fear, no matter how irrational, held to me like a vice… impossible to escape.
Muse
Additionally, I was in constant resistance to “what is”. Instead of learning to go with the flow, I swam against it. Every day it was like walking into an alternate universe… a warzone of mind. Nothing made sense. Where was I and why couldn’t I recognize myself? Why did it take so long to make it back to the Me I recognize?
So many questions and so much resistance. Again and again, I bang my head until the Universe hands me an identical 2nd life lesson of epic proportions. A repeat of the unimaginable. Only worse. I alone was responsible for breaking my heart and now I had to learn how to pull it together and discover the tools that would benefit me emotionally to ensure I learn from this ( to never repeat it) and be what I need to be for them. (They know who they are).
So, continue reading to understand why Radical Acceptance is important to learn, and how can you apply it to your life for maximum benefits.
“Acceptance doesn’t mean resignation; it means understanding that something is what it is and that there’s got to be a way through it.”
– Michael J. Fox
Why Radical Acceptance Is Important
This list is by no means exhaustive, just a few examples.
- Reduces Emotional Suffering: When we resist what is, we often create more suffering for ourselves. Radical Acceptance helps us let go of the emotional turmoil that comes from fighting against what is.
- Enhances Emotional Regulation: We gain greater emotional control by accepting our emotions without judgment. We learn to sit with our feelings, observe them, and respond with mindfulness rather than impulsivity. It’s being proactive rather than reactive.
- Improves Relationships: Accepting others as they are, and accepting ourselves, can improve our relationships. It fosters empathy and reduces conflict.
10 Steps For Practicing Radical Acceptance
So, now that you vaguely understand the concept, how can you add Radical Acceptance to your mental health toolbag? Here are 10 steps to get you on your way!
- Understand the Concept: Begin by gaining a clear understanding of what Radical Acceptance means. It involves acknowledging and fully accepting reality as it is, without judgment or resistance.
- Cultivate Mindfulness: Develop mindfulness through practices like meditation. Mindfulness helps you become more aware of your thoughts, emotions, and reactions without judgment.
- Observe Your Reactions: Pay close attention to how you react when faced with difficult situations or emotions. Recognize any resistance or denial.
- Label Your Emotions: Practice labeling your emotions as they arise. This helps create emotional distance and allows you to respond with greater awareness.
- Practice Non-Judgment: Let go of judgments about yourself, others, or the situation. Instead, focus on understanding and acceptance.
- Release the Need for Control: Understand that there are aspects of life that you cannot control. Let go of the need to control everything and embrace uncertainty.
- Self-Compassion: Treat yourself with kindness and self-compassion. Replace self-criticism with self-acceptance and understanding.
- Acceptance of Others: Extend the practice of Radical Acceptance to your relationships. Accept others as they are, even if you don’t agree with or like everything about them.
- Seek Support: If you find it challenging to practice Radical Acceptance on your own, consider seeking support from a therapist or counselor trained in Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT).
- Embrace the Present Moment: Focus on the here and now. Embrace the present moment as it unfolds, and remember that acceptance is not resignation; it’s about finding peace in the present.
Remember that Radical Acceptance is a process and may take time to integrate into your life. Be patient with yourself as you work towards greater acceptance of yourself, others, and the world around you. It’s a journey that can lead to increased emotional resilience and a deeper sense of inner peace.
What Radical Acceptance Is Not…
It’s super important to understand what Radical Acceptance is and is not. We’ve covered some of the Is, so let’s cover the “is not”. Radical Acceptance is NOT putting your stamp of approval on an injustice or a painful event. It’s not passively laying down, or throwing your hands in the air out of frustration and giving up. It is not waving a white flag nor is it surrendering. Radical acceptance is just that- accepting that things are how they are. It is accepting completely and totally that reality is unfolding the way it is.
The Journey Towards Radical Acceptance
Remember that Radical Acceptance is a journey, not a destination. It’s not about suppressing your desires for change or growth but about finding peace and clarity amid life’s inevitable ups and downs. By practicing Radical Acceptance, you are taking a significant step toward cultivating inner peace, emotional resilience, and a healthier, more compassionate relationship with yourself and others.
As a mental health advocate, I encourage you to explore the power of Radical Acceptance in your own life. It’s a practice that can lead to profound transformation and bring you closer to the mental and emotional well-being you deserve!
If you found this post helpful, share it with others who might benefit from this valuable tool in their mental health journey. Together, we can create a community of support and understanding! ❤ Muse
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Here’s more info about Radical Acceptance to get your learn on!
abipolarmuse 
Thanks for sharing..
Acceptance is powerful
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